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This is not the time to panic...

This weekend is the last weekend before Christmas and I'm kind of in screaming panic mode. I have my shopping done. I didn't knit much for anyone this year. I do still need to get on it and knit Grandma's socks. I didn't make her a pair last year and boy did I hear about it. Where is this dementia she is supposed to have? She didn't forget that she usually gets a pair of hand-knit socks. Not once. Not for a second. But that is all I have to do.

So why the screaming panic mode? Habit I think. Plus I have the road trip to AZ ahead of me and I hate driving. I really hate that road trip. I am so crabby by the end of it I just warn people away. I have to get the house ready (nothing worse than coming home to a messy house) and I'm just not in the mood. Cleaning house sucks, doesn't it?

I'm trying to at least get lights up so I don't look like a scrooge. I won't be here to enjoy them but then, they aren't really for ourselves, are they? Plus, I really like lights during winter. I wish we could leave our lights up through February. We really need them in the PNW. Unfortunately, it has been freakin' cold and I don't last long while I'm putting them up. It doesn't help that I'm trying to clean out my gutters at the same time. Too tempting to kill two bugs with one stick. I'm up there looking at the gutters, I can just scoop them out at the same time, right? Except the leaf material is frozen so it comes out in little bricks. This makes it both easier and harder. Easier because you just lift out the brick and harder because it is so cold!

My solution has been to do it until I can't feel my fingers and then I quit until the next day. Which means that last night I got to here.

I have been calling it my "Oh f**k it" design. Because it kind of is. It looks pretty funny actually. I hope my neighbors have a sense of humor about it too.

I'm wrapping up my last week of my second UBC. Bummed that we will be out for 3 weeks and I'm trying to figure out what I can do in the interim while the dojo is closed and I'm in AZ. Everyone keeps saying to walk but that isn't always an option with my knee. I'll try it though. I can feel so much more strength in every other way that it has to help, right?

As I get fit, I struggle with the fact that my outside isn't changing much. I have so far to go, it just takes a while. So I really rely on finding those moments where I know there is a muscle-bound me underneath the fat and when some of those many layers are gone, I'll get to show off a little. This means I really cling to those moments of "Cool! Look at that!"

There was an open gym after Thanksgiving (which means no class was scheduled but they opened the dojo up and we could come in and work out). I took advantage of it and was trying to get through my own version of Thai Kick Drills (over 100 round kicks - I do 30+) and realized that my speed between kicks was really improving. These are hard because my legs are big and heavy and my stamina sucks (whose wouldn't carrying all my extra weight around!). But I was actually getting a normal kick-kick rhythm than my usual, kick-step-kick.

It was awesome. It made me think that someday in the future I'll be able to do the Thai Kick Drills. Actually, it made me start looking up how much it would cost to buy a bag. If I could squeeze in some kick drills everyday...

And that was when I realized I had become one of "those"...

I am looking for opportunities to work out. I think strange things like, "Oh good, it is an abs day, I can't wait to do crunches."

People, Hell has officially frozen over.